Good Day!

Today has proved itself to be a fantastic day! Not only is it closer to June 2 (the day I get to meet Aprilynne Pike!!!!), but today I brought mini cupcakes to work and school that I made the night before. They were "so good you don't need milk,"(Baylee) which is considered the epitome of complements in the chef world apparently.... I didn't just bring the cupcakes to work because I felt like it! Miss Baylee's 14th birthday is tomorrow! And Baylee is a cherished volunteer at the library with her witty puns and lively laugh. I also brought her a fanci-fied copy of the first 12 chapters of my book with glittery letter on the front and everything! After work, me, Katie, and Baylee all went to Scoops where we enjoyed some of the finest(and expensive) iced cream!Yum!
At school my cupcakes were appreciated along with my new modeling pictures!(Photgraphed by Stephany Stefan) Stephany gave me a CD with 10 pictures she edited from the photoshoot on May, 8th and I quickly pulled them up and showed them to all my friends. My favorite being 'The Narcissist'(above). There's nothing that could've dampered my mood today; it was just so great!

Yeah, life is good.

*Although I may portray an evil villain in plays and a narcissist in pictures, I assure everyone that I'm not that. As a person, I like to think of myself as being nice and caring. I do not carry the snobby air that normally comes with the territory of blonde hair.

A Good Mom

I write a lot, mostly for my book: Dreaming Beauty, but I also write short stories and essays. When I write essays it's either for school or for myself. There are certain times in my life that I want to remember. The particular thoughts and feelings at those times makes me feel that I should record them.
Here is one of my personal essays:

In every class that I've had, throughout my entire life, there has been at least one girl who has a problem. Problems in the sense that I see them consist mainly of one thing: ignorance. Many things can sprout from ignorance like anger, hatred, and the endless ability to be just plain rude. Anger and hatred are practically banned from schools, but there isn't much the staff can do about a rude child. A rude child can be sent to detention or sat in a corner, yet they never truly learn anything from their punishments. I've grown up watching these children persist into punishments. Some eventually learn how to avoid being punished or simply grow out of it all, but I believe almost every girl grows up to be mean. It's how we're raised.
We grow up seeing older girls, wishing we were them, and we watch them closely as their horomones drive them into doing crazy things. As we grow we become more and more obsessed with our appearance. That leading us to picking out the faults in other girls until we have enough insults for them to cover any bad feelings about ourselves we may harbor. Only, those insults are only a temporary cover-up.
I will not claim I did not once do this myself because there was a time when I did. Thankfully, that time has long been over, but my memory isn't so short as to forget one detail of that time.
I know everyone has once been bullied, but there are girls who can be vicious. It was in middle school that I was first exposed to the true venom of words. Sixth grade had been the worst school year of all. I hadn't known before that my clothes weren't cute or that my skin was too pale. I hadn't reliazed that my glasses were dorky or that being different was unexceptable.
Before middle school you could've told me I was a brunette and I would've believed you because I hardly ever looked into the mirror. That all changed in middle school.
I remember my first day of middle school and how traumatizing it had been for me, but there was one moment in the middle of the semester that I have always remembered the clearest.
I had been waiting outside for my mom to pick me up. I was happy to be squished onto the bench with all the other car riders rather than onto the scary bus. When I started middle school I had to ride bus 61 and walk 3 blocks home, but that day had been special. I can't remember what made it special, yet what I can recall is when my mother pulled up in her 1994 turqouise Toyota Previa. I was ashamed that it wasn't glossy like most of the other cars, so I had hurried to get in. When I had buckled my seatbelt, I looked back out the window at the remaining kids on the bench. Many were talking to their friends, all except one girl. I didn't know her name, but I knew her personality from my dance class. She was loud and obnoxious, one of the girls that the teacher shhh-ed frequently. She had short hair, glasses, and always wore something that looked like it belonged to her mother.
"Who're you looking at?" My mom had asked while she waited for the car in front of us to move.
"That girl." I had pointed to her. I was staring at her long, black boots that extended from her heel to her thigh. In middle school we didn't have much of a dress-code, but I was sure she was breaking it. "Look at what she's wearing." I had said, disgusted by how much skin she had exposed.
My mom sighed when she saw what I saw and said, "Poor thing."
"Poor thing?" I asked, surprised my mother had given sympathy to a girl who I knew to be so rude. My mother had never given me sympathy, not even when I was bleeding.
"She doesn't have a good mother." My mom had explained.
I couldn't phrase her meaning back then, but I had understood enough.
I didn't say anything after that.


I love my mom.

Mr. Logan

Sexism, unfortunately, is very common in everyday life, especially for me. At Hot Springs High there is an array of culture and diversity, this diversity flourishes throughout the students and teachers. One teacher stands out from them, not just in appearance(height and...girth), but also in opinions. This man's name is Paul Logan. He has many talents such as: photography, lecturing, an unflinching ability to get side-tracked, excessive personalities, and an endless amount of sexist jokes. Mr. Logan is a strange character.

"Every man over forty is a scoundrel."
--George Bernard Shaw

My tenth grade year has been filled with him, for he is my first period world history teacher. Every morning through this semester, I have been awakened in his class by his odd character re-enactments, loud out-bursts, and endless lectures. In Mr. Logan's world history class I have learned many things that will certainly prepare me for the world.

"Mr. Logan," I said in a serious tone one morning. "One day I'm going to rule the world and when I do you'll remember this day."
Mr. Logan's calm expression reflected mine, that morning and remained constant in his reply of, "It's comical that you think a woman could do anything."
"I certainly hope you live to see the world under my rule and still have a mind that could remember that you were proved wrong."

Obviously, I do not plan on world domination being my future career, although it does sound quite charming.... My future career plan is to become a successful author, actress, and/or model. If not all, one will always be a dream come true(with the exception of modeling) and proof that I have succeeded in my life. I am not following what is set out for me, but what I feel good at and enjoy because I think a successful life is one in the pursuit and gain of happiness. While every man dies, not every man(or woman!) gets a chance to live.

"Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first."
--Mark Twain

Velma Von Tussle

Pure joy is a gem that is difficult to find in life, but I have found it in the words of my friends and utter strangers:
"I must tell you that your preformance was simply amazing. We were talking about the play on the soccer bus and many people spoke about how wonderful you were. :)" -Grace Anne B.

"You're stealing the show!"- Mystery Man

"You did a really good job, Jessa."- Seth

"You scared me sh*tless. You're a great actress; I know you're not that mean in real life."-Aaron ?

"I almost break character each time you sing "Legend of Miss Baltimore Crabs!"-Daphne (Tracy Turnblad)

Hearing compliments like those make acting special to me. I love acting so much because I have to find these characters and step into their skin. My role as Velma was my biggest role yet and I took charge of it. Thankfully it has all paid off. I'm happy and sad that the play is over, but now I'm looking forward to the next story we take on and what other character I can step into.

And whoever didn't get to come and see Hairspray, "you should've seen my bag of tricks!"